Saturday, May 19, 2012

Pizza, Atlantis & Realizations

I'm sitting on the couch waiting for Michael to get home with the pizza and even after a pretty trying day I'm feeling good. I'm about to work on a scene in a fiction book I'm writing, work some more on my Sane & Satisfied Heart book. Then when Michael gets home we'll eat pizza and watch Stargate Atlantis.

I'm also feeling good because I've come to terms with a few things that have been weighing heavily on me recently. Both of these realizations have come out of hurtful experiences. But with pain comes healing and deeper understanding of oneself.

One realization is that I can't make everyone like me and I can't make everyone think what I want them to think about me. All I can do is act in accordance with my beliefs. Those people who take it the wrong way or twist my words and actions don't deserve my energy.
I can't be everything to everyone. If I tried to be I would go mad. And I've come pretty close going mad a few times. As I sit here writing this and remembering a few instances where I really did try to please everyone and act how a bunch of different people in my life wanted me to act I have to laugh at myself. It's just so ridiculous and insane to even think that one person can make everyone happy. But we try, don't we? Oh, do we try!

Every situation is different. Everyone is different. And everyone reacts and deals with situations differently. During the past few months I kept trying to figure out a solution or a way of handling people and situation that would work in every case. But that's not possible. The only thing I can do is be flexible enough, aware enough and skillful enough to deal with situations as they come up to the best of my ability.

Hopefully realizations like this continue to pop up. Because if there's one thing that I know it's that humans waste a lot of time and energy on futile endeavors.

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